Things They'd Never Say

[rascalstooge]

Blanche Payson or Louise Emmons: "Report me to Child Protective Services, will you?"

[RJH]

Spanky: "You asking me where Cherry Street is, Jack? Why don't you use a GPS like everybody else?"

[tboneator64]

Stymie: What does poutine have to do with Ukraine gettin' invaded?

Spanky: No Stymie! It's Putin! POO-TIN!!

Stymie: What does passing gas have to do Ukraine gettin' invaded?

Spanky: No, not that pootin'! I mean Vladdy, doggone it!

Stymie: Whatcha daddy have to do with Ukraine gettin' invaded?

Spanky: I give up!

(I Stand With Ukraine! 🇺🇦 )

[rascalstooge]

Brisbane's mom: You'd make a better president than the one we have now.

[myhomeo]

Brisbane: "Yeah Ma, Herbert Hoover is pretty lousy..."

[tboneator64]

Brisbane: Hey Crabby! I really like that Daffodil poem! Can I recite it every day?

Miss Crabtree: Just for that Brisbane, your punishment will instead be to bring a horse to class every day.

Brisbane: Aww, doggone it, Crabby!

[RJH]

Spanky, Buckwheat, and/or Mickey: "Hey Froggy, that cleaning solution of yours worked great! Can you teach us how to make it, or at least let us buy some?"

[rascalstooge]

Spanky: The He-man Woman Haters Club is for boys who are disgusted by the portrayal of men in cheesy Lifetime movies.

[RJH]

Farina to Ritz-Biltmore Hotel manager: "It looks like you don't have anything for me to do right now, so can I play with the girl in Room 215?"


----

Miss Crabtree: "Class, you all excelled in history so much that you're skipping a grade, starting tomorrow."

Bonedust, nervous: "Is this some kind of April Fools joke?"

Miss Crabtree, cackling: "You finally got something right, Bonedust. Y'all are actually being demoted a grade."

Jackie Cooper: "It's worth it. I can't take having to see you every school day any more."

[tboneator64]

Jackie Cooper: You know Miss Crabtree, you ain't prettier than Miss McGillicuddy, at all. In fact, you're kind of homely looking.

Miss Crabtree: Now Jackie, what have I said about you and your classmates Miss McGillicuddy delusions? Y'all should know perfectly well Miss McGillicuddy only ever existed in script references!

[rascalstooge]

Janet: I'm the greatest girl in the Gang series, Mary Ann, Dorothy, Darla? Heck, they have nothing on me.

[rascalstooge]

Blanche Payson: "Clean up this room, Right now". Wheezer: "Yes, Mommie Dearest".

[malaria]

The weep-wah cake: "Boy, if only that Cliffy Klavan guy would imitate me on 'Cheers' 70-odd years hence!"

Laurel & Hardy: "THe heck with the cameo; we want to be IN 'Wild Poses', with Pangborn fussing around and making those silly faces..."

Emerson Treacy: "The industrial development of the United States was followed by the inexorable rise of a character known as the Shipping Clerk..."

Gaye Seabrook: "You think THIS is overexposed, take a look at THESE!!"

Old Cap: "Easy on the Brahms, Stymie. Can we have a little... Mozart?"

[tboneator64]

Stymie: I know Watt Street, ya door knob! Betcha don't know there's gonna be a Hoover Dam someday.

Jackie Cooper: Yeah, they'll name it that after our no good President goes to the Dam and then drops in!

[RJH]

Butch (and/or Woim): "Can I be traded to Spanky's football team?"